Life

From the moment we are born into this world we are learning. We learn to roll over, sit up, walk and talk. We learn to brush our teeth and dress ourselves. We learn to play and make new friends. We learn the birds and bees and we learn love.

Somewhere along the line we learn to become adults and take full responsibility for ourselves and complete ownership of our actions. We learn who we are and we learn our strength. Some of us learn to be tough because tough is what's brought upon us. Sometimes I feel that tough is just something I don't want to be. Right now, am proud of all the pain, for I am still standing.

What life has taught me:

I've learned to hit curve balls; actually I can knock them out of the park better than anything thrown straight over the plate.

I have learned to mend my own wounds better than any surgeon or doctor ever could and usually it only cost me a few tears and sometime a little humility.

I have learned to take punches that would knock Mike Tyson out cold. There's never been a ten count to keep me down.

I have learned that flying is best with your feet on the ground and your children holding the string attached to your heart like a kite.

I have learned that even the best romance novel can have the most terrifying twists that should have ended in a loss; yet I picked up a new book and started reading a new romance blind to what the end may be.

I have learned that no matter the distance, our souls travel to where we can't be, while our bodies remain where they are completing our everyday actions. I have learned you CAN love someone who has never ever been physically before you!

I have learned that no matter how hard I try, when I feel I've lost all faith, I find myself looking up to the sky and having a talk to the only person here 24/7 to listen.

I have learned that without hope and faith, I would never have made it this far. Without Angels beside me, my life would have ended that night and no one can tell me any different.

I am a person that always puts other people first, even when I still need to learn how to put myself first. I struggle to keep a clear head and a band aid on my heart. I wrote last year of a bonus I received at work and the new things it brought me to chase my dreams; one of which was this laptop. This year I received the same bonus for hard work done. This year I paid my bills, bought some things for my HOME and my children, took some Friends out as a way of saying I'm glad your here, and I set forth to pay it forward. I chose three ways to do this after going to Subby's and finding out they don't take Visa gift cards as payment. I was cleaning one night and realized I hadn't ate so I grabbed my coat and gift card and left in 30 degree weather with shorts on; no purse, just keys, coat and that card. I was embarrassed and felt terrible that the crew working that night prepared my food and I had no means to pay with me. Then the manager came to the window and handed me my food. He said "bring in the money tomorrow. I trust you and we all have to eat." I drove home that night in tears. There are more people like me in this world. I think the big picture here was not to give up on living life with my heart.

I wanted to do something more to try to instill a little compassion in this world. Instead of adopting a new soldier, I sent three care packages to different campaigns that Adopt A Platoon had running currently. I took money, I did need, and gave to someone I thought was a friend so that she could retake her state board tests, only for her to stab me in the back just two days later. I anonymously gave money, that I hope comes back to me, to a guy at work that can't afford new uniform pants that fit him. This one was tricking and hard to do, for when he had the chance to help me, he flat out didn't, which is exactly why I did what I did.

I put into action things I wish everyone would do. I wish the world would take the time to selflessly help one person when they have the chance, not to expect anything in return other than that they may have taken the motions to make someone else's life just a little bit better.

See once upon a time, there was this girl I knew in high school. We were always friendly and shared the same friends. Years later, we ran across each other because of technology. She was sent to me for a reason, to be my rock and my helping hand. When I had no where to go and my family didn't want part in helping me start over, she so very selflessly took me and two kids in. She's taught me my strength by example. She taught me to do for others, no matter what the world thinks of it. She taught me that I had a way out and I deserved to be alive and to be a mother. She showed me how to live. Despite the hardships and misunderstandings we faced, she is still here. She is still my strength, my understanding, my role model, my better half, my rock and my very best friend.

I leave you with this:

When life throws you curve balls, learn to hit!

When you see someone in need and are able to help; do just that, even if it is as simple as holding open a door for a mother with two kids in her arms, who you can look at and tell she is exhausted but still going. Simply, Pay It Forward!

Take into consideration other people, not just yourself, as you walk through this world.

At the end of even the toughest days, love yourself for who you are, mistakes and all!